What is a cult?

The word “cult” has a negative connotation in the church world. If anyone is involved in a cult they are believed to be out of the normal flow of Christianity. Dictionary.com’s definition #6 states a cult as “a religion or sect considered to be false, unorthodox, or extremist, with members often living outside of conventional society under the direction of a charismatic leader.” These leaders have a special “calling” from God. They are idealized by their followers who feel special to be a part of the group. Acceptance and love are an important part of the experience. Belonging makes a person feel good about themselves. Validation (approval) is earned from the group by following the parameters laid down by those in charge.

What kind of people get involved in these groups? All kinds. People want truth. We’re built to go after it. Our mind and soul desires truth. There is usually some element of truth espoused by these groups. The meeting of basic human needs (love and acceptance) draws people. We want to belong. Our chances of becoming involved in one of these groups increase simply because we are human beings.

Inside the group, definite parameters of conduct are spelled out by those in charge. It is understood what is acceptable and what is not. These parameters are not to be crossed. If you fail in any rule of conduct, either intentionally or unintentionally, you will experience guilt and shame. You don’t want anyone in the group to know about your faults. You want to protect your safe world. If your inconsistencies are exposed you might lose the fruit of being a part of the group… validation, acceptance, and love. You must hide. Others must not know your faults. Hiding becomes part of your nature. You become a liar and a fake. Ironically, this runs opposite of what drew you to the group in the first place… TRUTH.

You may end up confessing your faults to someone in “authority” with the intent to alleviate the overwhelming guilt and shame and to possibly fix your problem. If this happens, watch out! Known rule breakers must be dealt with. If rules are not enforced, the structure of the group is in jeopardy. It is the structure that holds the group together. Its creeds and laws help the leaders maintain control of the group.

The leaders will discipline you. This can follow any number of directions. You could be hauled up in front of the whole group and corrected. Your shame and guilt have now been multiplied several times over even though the purpose of your confession was to alleviate these very feelings. The most strict of cults use these methods. Talk about behavior modification’s effectiveness!

Another method of discipline might put you in a place where you need to answer to certain people about your behavior. This keeps you on a leash. You are watched. You are monitored. This is meant to keep you in line so future failure does not occur. This discipline may work for a while but usually does not have the lasting effect it is meant to engender. You will end up feeling like a failure. This method is called “accountability” in real churches.

A third disciplinary action that may be employed is shunning. The American Heritage Dictionary defines the word shun as this: “To avoid deliberately; keep away from”. This disciplinary response can create paranoia in the shunned person. Paranoia is “a mental disorder characterized by systematized delusions and the projection of personal conflicts, which are ascribed to the supposed hostility of others, sometimes progressing to disturbances of consciousness and aggressive acts believed to be performed in self-defense or as a mission.” If paranoia results from shunning, a terrible cruelty has been inflicted upon this person. To alter the mind of person is callous at best. I don’t doubt that people who shun other people in this way don’t necessarily intend this damage. Those in charge may deny it as “discipline” altogether. Shunning will drive a person to “mental disorder” if allowed to continue. Another element that may be employed indirectly is gossip. The well meaning leader may tell someone of your fault and this person turns out to be a gossip. Before you know it, all sorts of people in the group know of your failure. This also tends to paranoia. Who knows and who doesn’t? You end up living in a surreal world when you are around these people. You know gossip is occurring, yet no one talks to you. They just smile. The “all-knowing” smile. Or the “you really blew it” smile. Or the “you poor thing” smile. Or the best of all “I don’t want to catch what you have” smile.

By the way, if the leader is telling someone about your situation and that person is in no way involved, does that make the leader a gossip too? Oh, no, they're probably just asking prayer for you. This is the road to insanity! GET OUT!